I live in Los Angeles, California. It is one of the most diverse cities – with people from all over the world. It’s commonly described as a melting pot of diversity. I grew up in Sonoma County which is in the Bay Area. It’s located about an hour north of San Francisco. Everyone was very accepting back home and I thought I'd feel the same way about Los Angeles. When I moved here, the last thing I expected was to feel uncomfortable with who I am.

I happen to be Asian-American. I was adopted at the age of one from China and was raised in California. I’m just as American as the next person. I grew up with all the American traditions and holidays and feel no different than the average person who was born in America. However, I've come to realize that others don’t perceive me the same way.

I’m not quite sure why I’ve recently been subject to racism so often. A few months ago, I was walking to Whole Foods and there was a group of extremely drunk men standing on their balcony. They began to yell things to me in an Asian language. I was extremely offended but continued on my way and tried to ignore them. I’d experienced quite a few incidents like that before and every single time, I brushed it off. I didn’t think that any of those people were worth my time or energy.

However, it’s gotten to the point that I cannot sit back any longer. I’m fed up with people thinking that racial slurs are okay. I’m over people yelling at me in various Asian languages. I’m through with being fetishized. I don't want people to keep asking me which "type" of Asian I am.

Earlier this month, I went to a frat party at USC. This guy came up to me and asked for my name. After I told him, he complimented me and said that it was pretty. Next, he asked what my ethnicity was. I told him that I was Chinese. He then had the audacity to begin speaking in Chinese. I told him that I didn’t understand what he was saying because I was raised in America. He told me that he was disappointed because he liked Asians who were “fresh off the boat” as opposed to Asians who have been “white-washed” like me. Well dude, you weren’t the only disappointed person because I like guys who aren’t racist pigs.

Two weeks ago, I was sitting in math class and this guy came over to me. He asked me what my name was and after I told him, he wanted to know if it was Vietnamese. I told him that my name was Chinese. He then said that it was a bummer because he wanted me to translate something for him. I was feeling pretty annoyed at this point, so I hostilely said that I didn’t speak Chinese either. He then asked if I had grown up here and I replied, “Yes.” He went on to complain about how he didn’t know how to read Vietnamese. At that point, I did not want to chat with him anymore so I told him that he should just use Google Translate. The inner me wanted to scream at him, but instead I politely excused myself.

Today, I was putting money on my TAP Card so I could take the Metro to Hollywood. This man kept staring at me and before I could press a single button, he asked if I needed help. I’m not sure if this was because I looked like I could be confused or because he wanted to talk to me. The way he phrased it made it sound like the former.

This is where the worst part occurred. I was sitting on the Metro and a different guy came and sat next to me. I had headphones in so I clearly didn’t want to talk. I also didn't want to be rude, so I reluctantly responded to his questions. He began by asking me if I was Filipino to which I replied, “No, I’m Chinese.” He asked if I was studying in America in a tone that implied Asians don’t just live here without having a larger purpose. He then began to speak to me in Chinese and I very pointedly told him that I grew up here and do not speak the language. That should’ve been the end of it, but he wasn't done with the questions. He proceeded to show me something on his phone in Chinese and asked if I could read it. I then replied in a very forceful tone, “I WAS RAISED IN AMERICA AND SPEAK ENGLISH!”

I’m not quite sure why things like this have happened to me so much recently. Do I need a forehead tattoo of the American flag? Should I always carry a poster that says, “My name is Yulan. I’m Chinese. I was raised in America. I don’t speak Chinese and therefore cannot translate anything for you!”? Back when I had a Tinder, I would get messages all the time that said things like, "Wow - You're hot for an Asian" or "I've never found Asians attractive until I saw you!" Do those guys really think that that's a compliment? Yikes.

It's 2017 and the fact that this stuff is still happening makes me extremely angry. I'm not quite sure how to eliminate racism but wow, I wish I did. I'm just going to keep my head up, try to spread awareness and educate every single person who says something racist to me. As I stated in my first post of the year, I'm really trying to see the positives of life rather than the negatives. These occurrences have led me to becoming even stronger as a person and understanding more about the social construct of Los Angeles. It's also given me another topic that I can passionately write about in the hopes that it will create change. Let's all work on eliminating racism together.